Executive Dysfunction: top tier stress and how to solve it

Stress reduces bandwidth, and some of the most stressed people in hospitality are the C-suite execs, which could cause double  trouble if you’re not careful . . .

Pepple with executive dysfunction often find they lack the ability to handle frustration, starting and finishing tasks becomes evasive, recall becomes foggy, and following multi-steps directions no longer seems easy. Staying on track, balancing tasks, and making those quick and important decisions also becomes difficult.

To put it in Millennial terms, you suddenly find adulting harder than it should be. And, although the term is commonly applied to the neurodivergent, especially to those with ADHD as their diagnosis, the symptoms above can also be indicative of chronic stress and could even be the early warning signs of burnout. Which could be problematic for anyone, but especially for those at the top of the command structure.

Last year’s ninth annual State of Workplace Empathy Study from Businessolver found that 55 percent of CEO’s had experienced a mental health issue in the past year, and that 60 per cent of Millennial CEOs were most likely to have experienced a mental health episode or issue through anxiety, depression, loneliness, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), or burnout.

The report also found that the people at the top were really rather reluctant to admit it. Many C-suite execs saw therapy and, even, stress coaching, as a ‘last resort’ for a variety of reasons, including stigma, not wanting people to know, perceptions of weakness, time constraints, and more.

However, going all in on executive therapy or coaching is helpful for a variety of reasons. For a start, it’s tailored to you. If fits those who are in leadership positions and other high-stress roles. Also, it’s not a sign of weakness. Not even a little bit. Putting yourself first occasionally, prioritising your own mental health when needing to, is a wise decision, the strong choice. When you keep yourself in tiptop condition, it’s not only good for you, but it’s also better for the organisation you helm.

Additionally,  if you are both wise and proactive, and you seek help before things fall apart (rather than being reactive and talking about how your stress led to things falling apart) you will remain the strong, together and respected leader that you want to be.

Preventative medicine is a valid concept, so why not preventative coaching? But what would work best for you?

I’m an advocate of system developed by a psychologist called Albert Ellis. Called rational emotive behaviour therapy (REB-T) or rational emotive behaviour coaching (REB-C). Not only is it great as a therapy for all sorts of issues, it’s also an awesome coaching modality, including life, business and executive coaching. One of the best books I have read on the latter subject was written by Albert Ellis many years ago. It’s called Executive Leadership: a rational approach. Published in the late 70s, it needs a bit of an update, but the basic tenets still fit for today.

Better still, REB (T or C) is also considered to be a school of thought, or philosophy for everyday life. Not only can those concepts can be applied to almost anything, but they also become a great preventative in and of themselves.

I’m also a big fan of single session therapy and coaching. This is a bespoke service that usually lasts from 90 minutes to two hours and is very suitable for those that have very specific problems in mind, who don’t have time for the whole ‘let me tell you about my past’ malarkey, and who are also highly motivated to change. Sound familiar?

Better still, the coaches and therapists who offer this as an option will usually have near-immediate availability (immediacy being part of the single session service deal).

Another good thing about all the above is you can often find someone willing to work with you online. I work exclusively online as I find it suits both myself and my client base.

Working that way is not only easier to fit into your busy schedules, but you can also undertake your sessions from the comfort and privacy of your office or home, without anyone needing to know what it is that you are doing.

Not that there is a problem with people knowing as, when those at the top are willing to destigmatise stress and mental health, it has a trickle-down effect that benefits every other person in the organisation that is also struggling with their issues.

Reframing your struggles as strengths? Now, that is functional exec level leadership.

Daniel Fryer is a coach, therapist and wellbeing consultant with more than 20 years of experience. He is the author of the award winning How to Cope with Almost Anything with Hypnotherapy: simple ideas to enhance your wellbeing and resilience (Bloomsbury)and the best-selling The Four Thoughts That F*ck You Up . . . and how to fix them (Penguin Random House).

He has been on stage at the HOSPACE conference twice (as both guest speaker and panel moderator). He provides workshops and webinars to a variety of corporate clients and sectors, including hospitality, and recently provides content and strategy to a popular mental health app.